What in the world would you and I do if there was no such thing as music?
Can you imagine a world without music? No songs, no tunes, no rock, no roll, no jazz, no hymns, no boogie-woogie, no country-western, no symphonies. No singing in the shower. No whistling Dixie.
Lovers wouldn’t have songs to romance to. There would be no such thing as “our song.” Sinatra couldn’t fly to the moon. Elvis couldn’t complain about people stepping on his blue suede shoes. Tony Bennett would have to write a letter about how he left his heart in San Francisco. And Ray Charles would look pretty strange up on stage without a piano telling us that Georgia is on his mind.
Then when the wedding day arrived, what would the bride march down the isle to? A poem? Silence? Applause? And when the happy couple marched out of the church together, would they do it to the bark of neighborhood dogs, or perhaps all the wedding guests talking at once?
And at the reception, what would they dance to? The Funky Chicken just isn’t the same without music. Since rhythm is part of music, no drums would even be allowed.
And the honeymoon I suppose would take place with radio news on, or perhaps the educational channel accompanied by the drone of an air-conditioner.
When baby arrives, do we lull her to sleep with a reading from Shakespeare? Or perhaps random readings from the dictionary or encyclopedia? Could we bore her to sleep with words?
Nursery rhymes would have to be chanted or recited instead of sung. School music programs would of course be non-existent, as would school choirs and orchestras and bands. When the school football team plays, there would be no school fight song. Cheerleades would have to cheer and dance minus any music.
And when those birthdays roll around, we would have to all recite together in a monotone “happy birthday to you.”
And when duty calls, what would soldiers march to? What would take the place of music in